I HAD TWO NAPS TODAY! So 1AM doesn’t feel very late right now.

I have dance class tomorrow! I’m excited but nervous because it’s Girl’s Hip Hop and I am not the most graceful of dancers… I’m just not graceful of anything. Period. Blood. lol jk that’s disgusting and naturally occurs once a month. But some people don’t get it at all. My brother’s friend sadly only gets hers once a year and it’s extremely painful and it’s because she’s infertile. That is such a sad thing to learn when you go through puberty. Or through anything really. That you can’t have babies.

My mother often wakes up at around 1am to use the bathroom. Or so she makes it seem. But we all know the real reason. She’s patrolling the area for non-sleepers.

When I was a teenager, oh even til last year, I used to stay up hours and hours into the morning just chatting with friends online. I’m sure we all did/still do that. And our ears would be sensitive to the slightest indication of life outside the room. As soon as a finger touches a doorknob, your heart goes totally spastic because you know you’re about to get lectured like this:

KJDFBHJKN DFBLJNSB JLNSJSFJBNK;LG ;SKLGNSKJ; GNB;AKLNB AKLNFBKJAFNBKB!!!

You’ve exhausted me. Time for sleep :) I do not expect to wake up for anybody. 

Since being sick I have turned into… SLOTHGIRL. I can’t even be bothered explaining. Why am I here? I JUST WANT TO SLEEP.

I can’t remember the last time I went running. I just go for ‘walks’ now. WALKS! What am I, crippled now?

And my arms? You mean these things? *Flops noodles onto desk*

Ah, yes. And my stomach muscles. After my flu I was amazed at how flat my stomach was. Wow! What a difference! But then it dawned on me…

It wasn’t the fat I lost. It was the muscle. All I have is a layer of skin protecting my internal organs from mushy mushy. The thought of getting punched at sparring tonight is making me cringe. I’ve got a crinkly potato chip for a face right now.

It doesn’t help that every time I’m in the middle of working out, I get a visit from the Exercise Patrol. I’m on the floor, doing push ups, and I see feet pop up to greet me. They speak to me. They like to say, “What are you doing?! You’re sick!”, all in my father’s voice.

FYI, I have been sick for more than a week. I have been doing minimum exercise for far too long, spacing out my exercise and stopping frequently. But even when I’m healthy, I have my parents in the background clucking their tongues in disapproval. “Why are you torturing your body?” “Don’t do that, you’re too skinny” “Don’t run anymore, it’s not nice to have muscles”.

I know they are looking out for me. But it just seems excessive. I do my research and I understand my body. I push my limits but slow down when I need to. I know I can be reckless at karate, but I’m supervised then and we know when enough is enough. But at home, I’m much safer and I take care of myself.

So it’s a little frustrating to have your parents freak when you so much as lift a pillow. They think my vagina will fall off if I lift heavy things at home. They also get seriously angry when my brother punches me in the stomach. They must have their anatomy wrong because my ovaries aren’t that high up. My brother and I just continue in silence, remembering that while this is normal in the dojo, it’s certainly a surprise for your parents to see your little girl get hit. But let’s not forget that it was my father who suggested I do karate. We both just didn’t think I would love it so much.

HEY PEOPLE!! :D

I think I’ve recently grown a sweet tooth. Or over nine thousand?!? I for one LOVES THE COOKIES!! (Somehow I thought that caps locking my exclamation marks would emphasise that statement more but uh no).

Yesterday I had the most perfect day. I spent it with my favourite person in the whole entire worldd!!!!! The cookie monster! JK. He’s not a person, he’s a monster. My boyfriend! He’s the best :)

I’m so lucky to experience such happy days, you know? I’m sure you guys get those days too? Hopefully often! Any day has the potential to be wonderful. All you need is to smile! Although some days will require more denial or ignorance to do that. Hmm…

However, before I ran off and had the time of my life, I did sprain my ankle in the morning. I leaped off the steps and landed on my ankle, my body sliding across the concrete because maybe I just felt like surfing along my driveway, okay?

I was afraid telling my dad about my injury would mean I wasn’t allowed to go out soooo after a few minutes of heavy breathing I limped off to the train station anyway (Irresponsible? Yes. Am I a responsible person? No.). My father was exasperated when he found out this morning and he concluded that I injured myself because I was going to the city. “Why did you have to go to the city?! This wouldn’t have happened if you weren’t going to the city!”

He hates me going outside the house because that is where I will get kidnapped. However, my injury was not caused by my planned destination. My injury was caused by my tardiness. I always injure myself when I’m late. I’ve cut my fingers countless times with knives and tuna cans, scraped my legs against laundry baskets, dropped things on my feet… Besides, if he’s blaming my sprained ankle on the fact that I chose to go to the city; it was his idea that I do karate now and karate is where I frequently come home bruised and beaten, with sprained ankles for all to share!

Let’s not use this injury as “evidence” that going outside the house is bad. I like the outside world :( It’s pretty. And yesterday it smelled like barbecues. Because it was Australia Day. Delicious Day.

I hadn’t exercised since I sprained my ankle. I was using my injury as an EXCUSE! BAD! But it’s okay. I exercised just then :) Hence all that junk food has been justified. Junk food is delicious. Delicious Day is EVERY DAY!!! Let’s celebrate by eating more junk food!

So I failed my first unit at university. Before me, all three of my brothers have done the same. And tonight I learned that my parents also failed some things when they were at university too. 

I am so surprised. My mother? Failing? The woman who’s entire world revolves around science; who’s advice in life somehow always leads back to laboratory work, who’s fantasies probably consist of Bill Pullman with a science magazine for a face. Who would have guessed? 

I was also extremely surprised by the acceptance of my parents upon hearing news of my failing. 

I just had vegetable stew for late lunch. For brunch I had more vegetables and poached eggs. I’m a little anxious. Am I going to start growing tree branches soon?